Exodus 20:14
One of the greatest inventions of modern man is cyanoacrylate, also known as Superglue.
During the Vietnam War, medics began using superglue to seal open wounds on the battlefield, saving thousands of lives.
In 2006, a visitor to the Fitzwilliam Museum in Cambridge accidentally knocked over a 300 year old Qing Dynasty vase, shattering it in dozens of pieces. Conservators spent months painstakingly reassembling it with superglue, restoring it to near perfect condition.
Superglue is amazing.
But the extreme adhesive properties of superglue can also cause terrible damage if used improperly.
In 2020, a woman who was driving, reached into her purse and grabbed what she thought was lip gloss. She applied copious amounts to her lips, which were instantly glued shut with an unbreakable bond. She tried to call 911 only to discover it was extremely difficult to communicate through glued lips!
Eventually, after hours in the Emergency Room, doctors were able to use special solvents to pry her lips apart, but not without great pain to the woman.
On a bottle of superglue, you will notice a warning label. That label is critical for safe use. It is there for the safety and protection of those who use it.
God, in His grace, has given us a warning label of sorts for what is perhaps the greatest adhesive known to man. This adhesive doesn’t just bond physically, it bonds emotionally, spiritually. When it is used properly, it is nothing short of amazing. And it WORKS! Gloriously! When it is misapplied, it creates pain and trouble like nothing else on earth.
The warning label comes to us first in Exodus 20:14…
Exodus 20:14 You shall not commit adultery.
That warning is intended by God to guard us against the misapplication of an adhesive that is intended to bond a man and a woman together on a soul-level in holy marriage.
One man, one woman, becoming one flesh, for one lifetime. A covenant made before God, and bonded and ratified by sexual union, which, by the way, Tim Keller refers to as “covenant cement”.
Like all of God’s commandments, this one was given for our good––because God wants what’s best for us. And as Christians under the New Covenant, it applies to us in three primary ways:
It shows us God’s perfect moral standard for us.
It shows us that we are utterly incapable of keeping this commandment with our whole hearts, but that Jesus Christ our Savior has not only met the standard for us through His sinless life, but has paid off our debt as commandment breakers through His substitutionary death on the cross.
It shows those of us who are in Christ how to go on living in a way that pleases Him, which should be the desire of all those who genuinely belong to Him.
In order to appreciate these three applications, we need to understand the full scope of what this commandment means.
That is my goal this morning… to simply tell you what the commandment means, and let God’s Spirit use His Word to work on our hearts.
So what does “you shall not commit adultery” mean, exactly?
First, it means what it sounds like it means.
Adultery, on the most basic level, is marital infidelity. It is a man or a woman going outside the bounds of their marital covenant, and having intercourse with someone else. The consequences of adultery for Israel under the Old Covenant were severe:
Leviticus 20:10 If a man commits adultery with the wife of his neighbor, both the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.
Remember, these commands were given to Israel to protect them and preserve them in holiness before God. God, in His infinite wisdom, knows that if a marriage bond is jeopardized, it causes great harm to many people––and He wants to protect His people.
As Douglas Wilson put it, “A man who will betray his wife will betray anyone and anything. Adultery is treason against the family…”
But, as it turns out, actual adultery is not the only way to commit the sin of adultery.
As we’ve seen over the weeks, each commandment in the Ten Commandments states the most extreme form of each sin, but by implication also rules out the lesser forms of the same sin.
For example, last week we saw that the commandment not to murder also ruled out harboring hatred in our hearts for our fellow man.
In this case, when we look across scripture, we find that adultery implies all sins of lust.
Look what Jesus says…
This is Jesus’ famous Sermon on the Mount, and in this section He is taking commonly misunderstood commands of God, and restoring them to their right understanding.
Again, last week we saw Him do this with the command not to murder: “you’ve heard that it was said, ‘you shall not murder’, BUT I SAY TO YOU… anyone who even harbors hatred in his heart towards his brother is committing murder in his heart” (my paraphrase).
Listen now to what He says about the topic of adultery.
Matthew 5:27–30 (ESV): 27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ 28 But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
Remember, with Jesus, it’s always about the heart.
He’s not just after our outward obedience, He’s after our motives and our desires.
So according to Him, the seventh commandment can be broken by simply desiring a sexual experience with someone who isn’t our spouse.
Then He turns up the heat even more…
29 If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.
Jesus is not advocating for literal bodily harm (God wants us to take care of the bodies He has given us); He is using hyperbole to make a powerful point about the danger of sexual sin: if unrepented of, it will, like all other sins, lead us straight to hell. Jesus’ words, not mine.
Many in our culture and even in the church have tried to soften the severity of sexual sin.
It’s normal in our culture, and sadly, even among some so-called Christians, to freely engage in sexual behavior outside of marriage.
Dating couples sleep together, or push the boundaries in other ways.
Based on surveys, men and women alike often view pornographic material on a regular basis.
Social media has normalized sexuality and the objectification of our bodies.
All of this is desensitizing us to sin in ways that are difficult to comprehend.
Yet our culture has normalized all of it, to the point where it’s ‘weird’ if you don’t participate in these things.
For many of us who belong to Christ, 1 Peter 4:4 (NLT) rings true: 4 Of course, your former friends are surprised when you no longer plunge into the flood of wild and destructive things they do. So they slander you.
My admonition to you (and I echo the apostle Paul when I say this): DO NOT BE DECEIVED.
1 Corinthians 6:9–11 (ESV): 9 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, 10 nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
The interesting thing here is that Paul is writing to Christians.
He’s writing to people, who, according to verse 11 have been given a new identity in Christ.
They’ve been washed, sanctified, and justified!
That means they are in a new category where they can stand before God blameless on the day of judgment because of the work that Christ has done for them.
Nevertheless, He cautions them! He warns them not to be deceived into thinking that sexual sin is permissible for the Christian… and it seems his implication is that if we think we are in Christ yet continue in patterns of unrepentant sin, we are proving that we are not in fact in Christ. Because people who are characterized by sin will not enter God’s Kingdom.
Then he continues by explaining the reasons WHY sexual sin in particular is so incongruent with belonging to Christ.
1 Corinthians 6:13–20 (ESV): 13 “Food is meant for the stomach and the stomach for food”––and God will destroy both one and the other.
In other words, the Corinthians who Paul is writing to, were probably trying to justify sexual sin as a bodily craving.
“My body wants food, I give it food. My body wants sex, I give it what it wants… what’s the big deal?”
He says, “no. That’s not how it works.”
Then he tells us WHY we should not just give our bodies whatever they want…
The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.
That’s reason number one.
Sexual sin is improper for the believer because it goes against God’s intended design for our bodies. As redeemed people, our bodies are designed to be used to glorify Christ.
14 And God raised the Lord and will also raise us up by his power.
That’s reason number two.
We should flee sexual sin because we are anticipating the day when God will resurrect our bodies just like he resurrected Jesus. A body that is going to be used for something so glorious as resurrection with Christ should not be used for something so vile as sexual sin.
15 Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ?
That’s reason number three.
When God saves us, He makes us members of the body of Christ. When we sin, we defile not just ourselves but the church He has placed us in.
Apparently, many in Paul’s day did not know that… and many Christians today behave as though they do not know that.
Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? Never! 16 Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, “The two will become one flesh.” 17 But he who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him.
You might call this reason number four.
This graphic example highlights the context Paul’s audience was living in… Corinth was the Las Vegas of the ancient world. Sin was out in the open. Not dissimilar to the culture you and I find ourselves in.
His point:
When we commit sexual sin with another human being, we are using the proverbial ‘super glue’ God intended only for marriage, and we are gluing members of Christ’s body to the body of another.
This is not just a sin against another human being, it is a sin directly against Jesus Himself. Because you are part of His body, spiritually speaking.
A very jarring illustration.
So he concludes:
18 Flee from sexual immorality.
And then, reason number five…
Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.
According to Paul, there’s something unique about sexual sin that wars against our own bodies in ways that other sins don’t.
It is in our own best interest to flee from these sins, not just to casually avoid them.
Some people think they can endure sexual temptation because of their great self control. Paul does not encourage us to roll the dice on this one… he says to flee! Don’t even put yourself in those situations where temptation exists!
Something else I want to point out as a side note…
Notice, it doesn’t say to flee sex… it says flee the misuse of sex… sexual immorality.
In its proper context, the super glue must be used.
In a marriage, a husband and wife have the responsibility to fulfill the sexual needs of their spouse, not just to build up intimacy in the marriage but to make sure their spouse is not tempted.
In fact, sex within marriage is one of God’s primary means for helping us war against sexual temptation. We are to fight the counterfeit with the real thing!
In chapter 7, he goes on to say…
1 Corinthians 7:2–5 (ESV): 2 But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. 3 The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
Now, obviously we have to take this with some disclaimers. This passage is not to be wielded by a domineering or manipulative spouse in order to get what they want. The entire goal of marriage is to sacrifice your own needs for the needs of your spouse, and in doing so, be a model of Christ’s love.
Nevertheless, sex should not be intentionally withheld from our spouse. “Don’t deprive one another”.
Back to chapter 6, Paul finishes his argument like this:
19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, 20 for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
This is the sixth and final reason given to abstain from sexual immorality.
By the way, this completely flies in the face of the tag line of the modern sexual revolution: my body, my choice.
For the Christian, it’s: God’s body, God’s choice.
Our bodies are not our own anymore (as if they ever were in the first place).
And by the way, praise God they’re not! Because God’s purposes for our bodies are much greater than our own!
One of the great realities of salvation is that our old selves have been crucified with Christ, and that it is no longer we who live but Christ who lives through us (Galatians 2:20).
In light of that reality, our bodies are to be used for the glory of Christ in all things.
As we conclude…
I am deeply aware that many of us come to this topic carrying baggage.
For some of us, maybe it’s the pain of betrayal, either from a spouse or perhaps a parent.
For others of us, maybe you come to this commandment carrying the prudish idea that all sex is somehow dirty and displeasing to God.
Maybe for some here today, this commandment conjures feelings of guilt over past sins, or conviction over present ones.
Perhaps for others, it’s frustration: you hear this and you think to yourself, “see, Christians are always casting blame and telling people what they’re doing wrong, I knew I was going to feel this way coming to church!”
The reason this topic is never neutral, and never irrelevant, is because it cuts to the heart of human sinfulness.
Whether or not you’ve been a victim or guilty of adulterous behavior on a physical level, the reality is we have all been guilty of adultery on a spiritual level in the way we have strayed from God. In many ways, adulterous behavior is just a symptom of the deeper disease: hearts that are unfaithful to God.
Throughout scripture, God’s people are pictured as His beloved Bride. It’s one of the primary and most powerful metaphors used to describe God’s relationship to His people.
And all throughout scripture and all throughout history, we, His Bride, are unfaithful.
Throughout the Old Testament, Israel is repeatedly pictured as a faithless Bride.
Ezekiel 16:32 (speaking of God’s people in relation to Him)... You adulterous wife! You prefer strangers to your own husband!
Jeremiah 3:20 But like a woman unfaithful to her husband, so you, Israel, have been unfaithful to me”, declares the Lord.
Hosea 1:2 Go, take to yourself a wife of whoredom and have children of whoredom, for the land commits great whoredom by forsaking the LORD.
In the New Testament, the metaphor is continued as the Church is called the Bride of Christ. And still, she is characterized by unfaithfulness.
2 Corinthians 11:2-3 “I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him. But I am afraid… that your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ.”
In Revelation 2-3, Jesus addresses churches, His Bride, and finds that their love for Him is compromised.
When we look back over the history of the Church through the ages, we see patterns of disloyalty to Christ, and we see the same when we look at our own lives!
The good news is, in all of our unfaithfulness, God has been nothing but faithful to His Bride and will continue to be nothing but faithful to His Bride, because that’s simply who He is.
Isaiah 54:5 For your Maker is your husband––the Lord Almighty is his name… the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer.
The entire book of Hosea was written to depict God’s ever-faithful love for His faithless Bride.
Hosea 3:1 … Go again, love a woman who is loved by another man and is an adulteress, even as the LORD loves the children of Israel, though they turn to other gods…
2 Timothy 2:13 (NLT): 13 If we are unfaithful, he remains faithful, for he cannot deny who he is.
What’s more, the very message of the gospel is that Jesus came to ransom His bride back to Himself. He did this by living, dying and rising for us so that we could be with Him forever!
This is the ultimate conclusion of the seventh commandment! That in our unfaithfulness, Jesus has always been and will always be ever faithful, and that He displayed His perfect faithfulness through His substitutionary death on the cross for us.
Ephesians 5:25-27 “... Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing...”
Revelation 5:9 “Worthy are you... for you were slain, and by your blood you ransomed people for God from every tribe and language and people and nation.”
Titus 2:14 “…who gave himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works.”
Galatians 3:13 Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us.
1 Peter 1:18-19 “…you were ransomed from the futile ways inherited from your forefathers, not with perishable things such as silver or gold, but with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot.”
In this way, Jesus is the perfectly faithful spouse. Jesus loves His people with unending, perfectly faithful love.
What this means for us is that if we belong to Christ, our salvation is secure not based on our faithfulness but based on His.
It also means that any adulterous behavior in our own past has been forgiven and healed by Jesus. No matter what you’ve done, no matter how you’ve been unfaithful, your faithful Savior has paid your debt in full and given you His righteousness so that God sees you today as blameless.
It also means that we are called to live like we belong to Christ. We are called to live in a way that reflects our new identity as redeemed people.
Romans 6:1 How can we who died to sin still live in it?
This is not drudgery for the Christian. This is not giving up what really makes us happy in exchange for what God wants.
God’s desires for us are not incompatible with our joy; God wants us to have ultimate joy. He just knows that our ultimate fulfillment and joy is not found in sexual immorality, but in Him.
Psalm 16:11 … in your presence is fullness of joy, at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
One of the ridiculous things about sexual sin is that it totally backfires and gives us the opposite of what we are truly seeking.
CS Lewis: “It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”
May we be those who see Jesus as more glorious and more satisfying and more joy-giving than any sin, including sexual sin.
Depending on where you’re at in relation to all of this, here are some next steps to consider:
1. If you are currently in an ongoing adulterous relationship, it’s time to repent and turn to Jesus.
2. If you are hurting from a past adulterous situation, it’s time to cast your hurt upon Jesus who loves you.
3. If you are struggling with sexual sin of any kind, let me suggest some next steps:
Begin filling your mind with God’s Word every single day. Read it. Memorize it.
Psalm 119:11 (ESV): 11 I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you.
Begin a habit of daily prayer. Set aside a time to pray. Decide ahead of time when and where you will do it; you’re more likely to follow through that way. Get on your knees and beg God to give you a desire for Him that outburns your desire for sin.
Surround yourself with others who are fighting a similar battle and who are seeing victory in their lives.
Celebrate Recovery
Church community…
Sunday mornings, Mid-sized gatherings (like Dinner Groups, Beach Groups, and Smaller Circles like Discipleship Groups) and find people in the church who you can be appropriately honest with who can continue walking through challenges alongside you.
Don’t fight the battle alone.
If you are not yet sure that you belong to Jesus, your first step is to repent of your sin, trust Jesus as your Savior, and get baptized.
Discussion Questions:
What does the command ‘you shall not commit adultery’ mean? What are some ways it can be broken, besides literal sexual intercourse with someone other than your spouse? (See Matthew 5:27-30)
What are the reasons Paul gives in 1 Corinthians 6:13-20 why sexual sin is unacceptable for someone who belongs to Christ?
The culture tells us, “my body, my choice”. Why doesn’t this attitude apply for the Christian?
Talk about Jesus as the perfectly faithful Husband to His Bride, the Church. How should that truth inform the way we feel towards our own struggles with sexual sin?